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Okay, lets try and see what happens

 It was August 2018, and for the first time in what had felt like an eternity, a conversation about children between Rachel and I was different.


Before, the conversations would mainly revolve around what would be given up, but a random conversation between Rachel and I was about more practical things, such as our home layout, and who we could possibly get to babysit should we start a family.


Trying not to get too excited, I asked Rachel if she was feeling more positive about the prospect. I can't remember her exact wording, but the gist was that she had done some soul-searching, and determined that her current life wouldn't completely disappear should we start a family. 

We had plenty of friends who had previously said they would be "honoured" to help out, our family weren't that far away either, and plenty of our friends had children by this point who could share help and advise (or simply an understanding shoulder to lean on after a sleepless night). 

It could in theory work out as a best-of-all-worlds situation, and that the only real way to find out, was to "just get on with it" - that I do remember her saying. 


We both decided, that we should wait one more month, to see how we both feel (let's be honest, I wasn't going to change my mind any time soon, but it gave Rachel that extra bit of thinking time to make doubly-doubly sure that she was happy to start trying.


After all, we had never had unprotected sex before, and you can get pregnant the very first time you do. At least that's what we were told at school anyway.


So, in September 2018, and after 3 years of discussions, tears, ebbs and flows, the curtains were closed, the clothes came off, and for the first time, the condoms stayed in the drawer. 

How hard can it be? (pun intended) - it felt as new and stressful as the very first time. 


..Only 5 weeks to find out if our school teachers were right.

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